Loser News

“…One man bursts his bonds to fight for justice…”

Lords of Light, Ooklah!!  Thundarr the Barbarian is back and bringing his post-apocalyptic, tri-syllabic exclamations to a theater near you!

Australian bad-boy, Russel Crowe, portrays Thundarr; a restless barbarian of angst and aptitude, who wields the fabulous Sunsword. Along with Yeti-esque companion Ookla the Mok (Ben Affleck) and super-hot sorceress, Princess Ariel (Kathy Bates), the barbarian band is back battling baddies, beasties, and bewitching beauties in order to do something that will bring about the end of someone’s evil dominion.

Burt Reynolds plays the villainous Mumm-Ra, a catlike mummy from a distant time warp with magical powers to turn into a huge super-mummy-guy that shoots pinkish stuff out of his fingers, until Lion-O (also played by Australian bad-boy, Russel Crowe) brings the Sword of Omen to bare against his interloping undead nemesis.  But luckily Space Ghost and the Herculoids arrive just in time to see Mumm-Ra banished to the Forbidden Zone along with all the evil wizards and knights of New Earth!!

Granted, this cinematic masterpiece is still in the “planning stage”, but Affleck has already signed on and Bates is a near lock.

“Thunder-Thunder-Thunder-Thunder Cats!  HOOOOAAA!!”