Loser News

Hey everybody, it’s me Ted. Well, deer season is coming up again and I can’t wait. After a summer of catching fish and clubbing seals, I’m more than ready to get back to some good, honest deer killin’.

Rifle season is still a ways off, but next week starts Tire Iron Season which is quickly followed by LaCrosse Stick Season. They just added Bungi-Cord season this year (where you have to sneak up and strangle a deer with a bungi-cord) as a potential replacement for Reciprocating Saw season, and have plans to eliminate Bow Season in lieu of Katana Season.

All in all, I think the changes are a welcome and progressive response to the growing “abstract hunting” crowd who want to kill, but don’t want to seem “kitsch”. Happy killin’ everybody!!