Outer Space – An out of control Russian communications satellite was shot down today by a a group of three beachgoers with a Hasbro Water Winger 2000.
The trio said they were shooting at a seagull and underestimated the maximum effective range of the water balloon sling shot. A commercial satellite from Iridium LLC was also reported missing, for which the three deny any complicity.
Scientists say the other 16,998 sattelites hurtling around the Earth remain unharmed, and city officials have amended Laguna Beach Municipal code 18.04.095 Beach activities, sports and games, to read:
No person shall engage in any activities or conduct or participate in any sports or games that constitute a hazard to any person, space craft, or satellite including but not limited to sand throwing, or the use of a hard ball, softball, bat, football, paddleball, Frisbee, boomerang, or water balloon propelling mechanism or other athletic apparatus or game equipment or object. (Ord. 1369 § 2, 2000).
Loser News 
Leave a comment