Loser News

…it’s a dream where I’m standing before a group of my peers delivering a speech without attire. I find it quite vexxing.

I have another dream where I’m falling, but right before I strike the ground, I wake up. I’m told that if I were to actually impact with terra firma in said dream, I would expire in the physical world as well.   I’m not sure I concur. 

Then I have this other dream (usually when I’ve eaten Thai) where I’m dressed as Honk Kong Phooey and eating at the same French restaurant as Ferris Bueller and his compatriots, albeit at a different table. The snooty Maitre’ D brings me a plate full of urinal cakes as an appetizer, then turns into Cat Woman.

And that is the dream I have for this great country of ours.