Loser News

Well, my wife said she had to watch a Webinar lastnight for her business.  I advised her to be careful, because Lord Zedd is always looking for ways to reach into our realm and control our existence, and Webinar sounded like a really good name for one of his monsters.  She just let out a nervous laugh, like the time I wet myself on the Materhorn (I drank a slushie and the line was super-long). Like the rest of the fairer sex, she doesn’t watch a whole lot of Sabban’s The Power Rangers, so she really has no idea what she may be getting herself into.  Luckily, she’s married to me.

Sure, most of you already know about Arachnofiend and Spidertron and how Thundermegazord was barely able to beat them one at a time.  Now, imagine the two spider-monsters combined!!  There wouldn’t be enough Zords in the universe to defeat it, and that is Webinar.  The most vial creation that Lord Zedd, Rita Repulsa, and King Mondo ever joined forces to unleash upon our world (not to mention my stunningly attractive, yet perilously naive better half).

Luckily, I still have the power bracelet that Tommy (White Ranger, not Green Ranger) sent me in a cleverly disguised cereal box.  I may just be able to reach him (if he hasn’t travelled too deeply into the forbidden zone) and summon him back to help his home planet.  I’ve been practicing my Hip Hop-Kido under the tutelage of Zack (Black Ranger) Unknown Last Name, and I vow to defeat Webinar and all his minions (although, admittedly spiders do creep me out), and keep my loved ones safe from harm.  I must away!

Teradactyl, Sabertooth Tiger, Mastadon, Tyranosaurus Rex…uh, Pink Dinosaur!!