In a brief fit of cognitive clarity, Israel’s leader, Benjamin Netanyahu said killing Iran’s Supreme Leader Khamenei would ‘end the conflict’ that Israel started by bombing the country.
”When your enemy is killed, they can’t really fight anymore”, he went on to explain. “This is really going to be a game-changer for me.”
Netanyahu, who began bombing Iran last week, says his original plan was “just to knock down some buildings and injure a lot of civilians”.
”But I think this regime-change thing might actually work better,” he told reporters at a press conference, “just like it did in Iraq and Afghanistan!”
When it was pointed out that his own elimination would likewise end the conflict, Netanyahu deflected the statement with his +2 Dwarven Shield of Hypocrisy.
Along with toppling Iran’s leadership, Netanyahu now plans to eliminate several other foes that are harshing his proverbial buzz, specifically; Dr. Strange, 4 members of the International Criminal Court and Steve, the idiot barista that keeps getting his coffee order wrong.
Loser News 
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