Loser News

Gess what! The elekshuns are coming up againe, and your frend Torri is geting owt the boat!!

Now, it seems lyke just yesturday that Robobama an Mint Rockney were dooking it owt for the prezidensy. But today there are to compleetly differnt peeple whom want to be prezidense, one of whom is a gerl!!

Her name is Kamelmom, an she is supper smart and a loyer an stuff. Plus, evudently, she is an Afrakan Amerikens!!

The uther persen running for prezidense is Danold Tramp, whom is on T.V. Just lyke I was when I stared in Bevurly Hells 92101!

I’m not sure whom I’m goin to boat for, or if I even can boat, becauz evudently you have to be a citezen to boat and I’m Jewesh, just lyke my dad Erin Speling whom is ded!