Loser News

ARBY’S PARKING LOT.  OJAI, Ca.-The Dalai Lama met with, Knight Rider star, David Hasselhoff today to discuss world issues, including; world hunger, the global economy, America’s Got Talent ratings, and lasting peace for mankind.

“This is a significant and unprecedented moment,” relates Wolf Blitzer, host of liberal infommercial, The Situation Room.  “If only the Pope had lived to see it.”

The meeting sets the stage for a number of future celeb/guru meetings set for later this spring.

“Next week Jennifer Anniston and Maya Angelou will be discussing fashion and fascism at a Denny’s in Tarpon Springs, FL.,” Blitzer reports, “and following that we’ll join Al Sharpton and Michael Richards at a symposium on racism and hair gel at Popeye’s Chicken in Dayton.”