Remember when the Evolution Fairy turned an ant-eater into a whale?!? That was awesome! Herself (or himself possibly, as EF has never been photographed nude) a highly evolved panda, she/he will attempt her/his/their next magnificent feat during the vernal equinox, turning a kangaroo into a humming bird.
Granted, it will take four billion years to complete this process, but anything good is worth waiting for, right? Unfortunately, their won’t be a fossil record, because all species undergoing a macro-evolutionary shift turn into caramel upon death and are consumed by turtles.
I can’t wait to see the end result!
Loser News 
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