Loser News

Hey everybody!!  It’s me, Ted, and it’s time for another installment of Killin’ Things With Ted.  Now, I know that most of you are still indoors from the harsh winter we’ve been experiencing, but I gotta tell you, this is prime killin’ season! 

Now, I once heard, “Never look a gift horse in the mouth”, and I assume that applies to most other species of animal and not just to the family equidae.  So, whenever I’m driving along and see a errant rodent sacrifice itself to a passing motorist, I pull my Chevy pickup over to the side of the road, hit the hazards, and get the snow shovel out of the  back.  Once the critter’s head is smashed and removed, I slap it in my Coleman, and take it home. 

Sure, it’s stringy and tough, but it makes some of the best jerky this animal killin’ man has ever tasted.  Unfortunately, you’ll have to tell your friends it’s venison or duck, because most folks just can’t swallow the truth.