Category: Breaking News!!
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Injury Report
Barnstead, NH- Maintenance worker, Ike Johnson, is doubtful for Saturday’s overtime shift at the Lakes Region Pellet factory after being sidelined Thursday with a sore right hamstring. “It’s been a tough year,” the Electrician admitted. “Last month, the calf strain. Now this. I’m not worried though. I’ll bounce back.” LRP has had a long string…
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чепуха!!
MOSCOW (Reuters) – Russia used helicopters and tugboats to battle a fire that engulfed a nuclear submarine docked at a shipyard on Thursday, but emergency officials said radiation levels were normal. “Radiation levels are normal,” a spokeswoman for the emergencies ministry said. “No one was injured.” A source at the shipyard told RIA news agency…
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Revolution?
Violence erupted at an Occupy Wallstreet rally in Oakland Wednesday as police released tear gas and smoke grenades into the bovinesque mass of pseudo-hippies, scattering tents, bongos, and granola throughout the streets. “This is an outrage,” Michael Moore exclaimed from one of his residences. “If I didn’t already have a reservation at Golden Corral tonight,…
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First Lady Captured / Crocodile Visits Open
BUNAWAN, Phillipines-The hunt for Michelle Obama, who ate a water buffalo in a small Philippine town, is over and locals hope to turn the creature into its star tourist attraction. As she hasn’t eaten since her capture, officials are closely monitoring Obama for stress after placement in an 8,611-square-foot pen secured by four-foot tall concrete…