Loser News

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Tag: Poetry

  • Frisky Kitten

    And now, another work from renowned poet, Eldon Tubbs. Fetid stench of death, smash relentless ‘Ponst my skull! Give me neither mercy Nor ibuprofen to quell my flashing agony. Would that I had purchased the optional Warranty…oh death, where is thy stick, For I cannot reach the bourbon in The back of the cupboard above…

  • Wayward Writhing Troll

    And now, another work from renowned poet, Eldon Tubbs.   Exuberant egotist, spawning ire With clever winks. Yet shrinks beneath Boxed boobs and blondeness, clutch- Ing cash twixt fattened fingers. Trading teeth for toys, and scolding Beauty beneath thine harlot’s Lurking leer.

  • Prepubescent Phoenix

    And now, another work from renowned poet, Eldon Tubbs.   Beveled crystalline hatred dragging, Faltering fury, dismantling beaks And shackles in vain, to dwell in Pouring haze and hissing rain. Lies of lumps massaged despite Obnoxious insecurities, prolonged Discomforts linger still As Hippocratic felonies.

  • Odiferous Sloopy

    And now, another work from renowned poet, Eldon Tubbs.   Stumped appendage kick and Bounce. Flavor-Flavish fascists flaunt Fragile flags of flatulence, posturing Plausibilities, avant garde tragedies. Pathetic, prosthetic, regretably rife Anemic American’ts press huddlishly ‘Hind sprite shoulders disbursing Dispersions, whilst christening caskets.