Tag: cat
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Coincidental Cat-Tastrophes
A senior cat is miraculously alive after her owners fell nearly 400-feet from a Bryce Canyon cliff. Best Friends Animal Society said the cat, a 12-year-old tabby named Mirage, was found next to the bodies of Matthew Nannen, 45, and Bailee Crane, 58 who had been her owners for 6 years. Mirage appeared to be…
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America Says “Nyet” to Russia
‘MERICA- Thousands of flabby Americans took to the streets today to boycott Russia’s unprovoked aggression toward its Ukrainian neighbors. In Omaha, protesters purchased and smashed thousands of bottles of vodka, some of it Russian, until stores ran out and they were forced to smash Jack Daniels bottles to symbolically express their angst. “Suck on that,…
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And now a word from our sponsor…
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Feline Reform
Obama and Congress are going to push for increases on taxes for pet owners, and kitten keepers specifically. In his 2011 budget, Obama calls for going back to the Ford era “Cat Taxes”, which required a luxury tax to be paid monthly on each feline in a household. House speaker Nancy Pelosi and Ways and…