Category: Things Ron Doesn’t Get
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Infotainment News
In Idol news, twelve year old seventh season runner-up, David Archuleta correctly spelled the word “memoir”. “I always spelled it with a ‘w’ before,” the Jonas Brother wannabe mentioned at a K-Mart album signing. “Maybe my father will finally accept me now.”
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What Defrock?!?
You heard it first here, folks. Father Murphy has officially been defrocked. Though dead these past twelve years, he has evidently been carrying on his perverse aganda nonetheless. Catholics are irritated. “I think its against regulations, what he did,” remarked Leona Dimarco, parishoner of St. Steve’s in Alberta Canada. “But there’s so many rules, who…
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Bjorn Borg’s Critical Step-Aunt
Recently I was playing with my Philo Farnsworth action figure when the ever-familiar "Farnsworth Vs. Zworykin" controversy violently rebirthed in that gelatinous part of my brain where I think I lost that pencil. I mean, anybody who thinks Zworykin's iconoscope predates the inspiration of a fourteen year old Farnsworth's image transmitting brain child is a commie and…
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Columbo Day
Well, as Peter Falk holidays go, this has got to be one of my favorites. I like it way more than Veterinarians Day, Lemur Day, St. Hat Tricks Day, and Valium Times. I mean, to get the opportunity to honor one of America’s greatest detectives is totally a slap in the face to the rest…