Loser News

News you didn’t know you didn’t need…


Category: Business

  • And now a word from our sponsor…

    Where do you go for all of your postmortem beauty supplies? Boy Howdy!! That’s right, Boy Howdy, with two convenient locations in the Provo area, is your one stop shopping center for all of your taxidermy and undertaking needs. So, where can you get quality corpsmetics at factory pricing?!? See our commercial here!!

  • And now a word from our sponsor…

    Who says American ingenuity is dead?!? Not Laverdean Willis, founder, owner, and CEO of the latest in luxury feline waste removal, Cat Scat. No more emptying that disgusting litter box, now you can pick up the phone and dial 1-866-CAT-SCAT and a trained feline-waste management professional will be at your door in minutes! Cat Scat…

  • Save Your Penneys

    Phones rang off the hook in the headquarters of Change.org (CHick ANd Girl Equality for ORGanic produce) early Wednesday when the corporate world thrust open the revolving door of gender equality with its beefy, man hands, and ushered in a tidal wave of cultural ignorance. “I couldn’t believe what I was seeing,” exclaimed semi-professional golfer…

  • Adieu, US Airways. Adieu.

    Dear US Airways, I just received disturbing correspondence from the “US Airways Dividend Miles Audit” Guy or possibly Girl, chastising me for misusing my dividend miles account. Admittedly, I have purchased tickets for my sons in the past utilizing my dividend account number, and your high quality on-line site has allowed me to purchase said…