Category: Government
-
Gizmo Detainee To Appear In Court
U.S. authorities have scheduled the first Gizmo detainee to appear in Federal Court, flying him into New York to face trial for the 1984 bombing of a movie theater in the town of Kingston Falls, the Justice Departmentsaid Tuesday. The department said the premorphosized gremlin arrived in the early morning hours Tuesday when he and owner, Billy Peltzer, were turned over…
-
Stupid White House News
WHITE HOUSE, Washington- Secret Service agents shot and killed recently appointed First Dog, Bo Robinson-Obama, when it was realized that he was actually a highly trained radical Muslim assassin. “Who’d have thunk it?” new dog owner and President of the United States, Barack Obama mused. “Lucky, we found out before he ate the kids.” Bo,…
-
I Have A Dream…
…it’s a dream where I’m standing before a group of my peers delivering a speech without attire. I find it quite vexxing. I have another dream where I’m falling, but right before I strike the ground, I wake up. I’m told that if I were to actually impact with terra firma in said dream, I would…
Loser News 