Loser News

News you didn’t know you didn’t need…


Tag: Obama

  • Michelle Obama Attacked By Dog as Klan Looks On

    WASHINGTON, D.C.-The First Lady received an early Christmas suprise when Sunny, the Obamas’ new canine family member, viciously attacked her and a young Whitehouse visitor during the yearly Christmas Tree lighting ceremony. Numerous guests witnessed the incident, including a group of Asian KKK members and the usual multicultural group of disinterested children. Sunny, a Portugeuse…

  • Possible Chemical Weapons Possibly Used

    Today President Obama confirmed anonymous reports of the possible use of chemical weapons in Syria. “We are certain of the possibility that either the Syrian Government or insurgent fighters, or quite possibly an unknown faction, has possibly utilized possible chemical weapons against their adversaries, or quite possibly themselves,” the President advised. “In any case, I…

  • Doing It For The Kids

    From behind a human shield of strategically placed multicultural children, President Obama addressed an emotionally torn country about the hazards of not following policies put forth by eight year olds. A visibly indifferent Hinna Zeejah, one of seven Long Island residents who survived Hurricane Sandy, sent a powerful message to the Head of State, saying,…

  • The Presidental Debaise

    Geuss waht! Lass nite I watched the Presidental Debaise!!  It was supper awsome and Robobama was there with a new Presidunt named Mitch Rockney. He was older an had reelly nice hare and he was supper smart and ansered all the questions pollitely. But Robobama seamed mad an din’t want to talk abowt his erconmic…