Tag: Christmas
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The Cutting Edge
BRITTON, Mi-A local amateur lumberjack stumbled upon an amazing find while urinating in the woods near his home. “I’ve been peeing in those woods for years,” the Michigander related. “Guess I shouldn’t walk while I do it.” The man, known only as “That Tim Guy”, found several rectangular-trunked trees in a grotto just beyond his…
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Company Christmas Party
This year rocked!! Our profits totally douched those crap slappers at Accelerated. I love you guys! You’re the best bunch of bovine breeders a boss could ever ask for, and even though Rita in accounting wouldn’t sleep with me, it’s okay because I think she’s a lesbian. Freddy, I just want to thank you for…
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Ho! Yo! Word
Das right!! Danta Claus be’s comin’ ta town! An’ he gots all the gifts what keep on givin’, yo! Like, I gots one a’ them iPod’s das got eight gigabams and stores all my own personal rap songs, like Da Warehouse Rap-Song I did wiff my home-dawg, Mudd-Phlap. Anyways, I just wanted to tell all my homies and dawgs…
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Holiday Killin’
Hey everybody!! This is Ted! Like most of you, I took Christmas off from killin’ in order to partake in the warm glow of love and peace ushered in by the birth of our Lord and Savior. But at 12:01 AM on December 26, I was back in the killin’ saddle with a throat parching,…
Loser News 