Category: Killin’ Things With Ted
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Wookie Killin’
Hey everybody! It’s me, Ted. Ya’ know, the boy and I were watching these movies the other night called Star Wars. They’re about this kid who grows up to be his own dad, then kills himself because he’s a robot. Total suckorama. Take it from Ted, America, save your money and about fifteen hours of…
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Mooses!!
Pssst!! It’s me, Ted. I’m whispering because I’m sitting near a mountain spring, in a thicket in the Grand Teton Mountain Range, watching a mother moose suckle her young calf. As I stare out at the beauty of the wild, I gain a clear glimpse of the majesty of nature, and my place in it. …
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The Ones What Nearly Get Away…
Hey everybody!! It’s me, Ted, and it’s time for another installment of Killin’ Things With Ted. Now, I know that most of you are still indoors from the harsh winter we’ve been experiencing, but I gotta tell you, this is prime killin’ season! Now, I once heard, “Never look a gift horse in the mouth”,…
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Deer Killin’
Hey folks!! It’s me, Ted, and this is another installment of Killin’ Things With Ted. This week I’m going to be going over the basics of killin’ a deer with your bare hands. As seen here, I have killed this deer with my bare hands. How did I do it? Ancient Chinese secret. I’m just…
Loser News 