Category: International
-
What’s With Mahmoud?!?
Yesterday, Iranian President, Mahmoud Ahmedinejad, made pinchy motions as he advised the United Nations that the 2001 World Trade Center disaster was, in fact, a U.S. Government conspiracy. This statement, follows his 2005 denial of the Holocaust, suggesting European and U.S. complicity in forming a Jewish state in the Middle East. The Ross Perot of…
-
An Existential Boat Loan
Zimbabwean farmer, Gamba Ndlovu writes: Dear Scott Financial Services, Recently I have decided to alter my employment and begin a new career, and for this reason I have contacted you. My yak has gone to be with the elders, thus I can no longer sustain my family on the vegetation my plot can produce. As…
-
Terrorist Talk
Earlier today, international Terrorist, Heussmama Bin Daetn, released his most recent videocassete, which spells out doom for America, Democracy, Neil Diamond, and Ferbies. Here’s an excerpt!! “Greetings infidels! You will be smashed on the grill of the bus that is Islam! Despair greatly for Allah shall deliver you into our hands like tumorous, starchy vegetables…
-
Mexican Stand Off
In food news today, Mexican President, Felipe Calderon was quoted as saying he would restrict border crossings from America to “only those people in possession of a valid American passport…and people with a lot of money”. The comments followed criticism of his foreign policy from Mexican noble, Don Diego de la Vega, who believes America…
Loser News 